Just keep swimming, just keep swimming…

So apparently falling asleep shortly after having watched Pinocchio will have you dreaming some crazy ass dreams. 

Blake Shelton was even in my dream. He got eaten by a whale. Sorry, dude.

my moms face watching the gangnam style video. I can’t…

If you’re not a upper-class straight white male then you are fucked. Common sense can tell you that much. But as we know very well common sense is clearly not that common seeing how this fucker is still in the race… damn you America! 

My husband’s idea of having a strategy lol! :P Needless to say, I WON! 

I know a few people who will be excited about this…myself included? LOL

suicide note will read:

Dear World,

I don’t understand.

See you in hell.

one thing I do hate about living in apartment buildings is not being able to sing super loud at night. I mean, my neighbors having to put up with my shitty voice in the day time is one thing, but interrupting their sleep might get me evicted fo’ sho.

Miranda Lambert is my role model. So yes… I will shoot you.

(via feeshyfeeshy-deactivated2012092)

Crack is wack.